Rewind 3 - When "Some Day" becomes "This Day" - part two of two

 Saturday, April 19, 2014

I've put off writing about Leo's funeral because I do just fine until I think about it and then I'm in tears again.  So I'm taking some deep breaths and brushing away the blur in my eyes and pushing forward.  I promise to do better with my next post, but for this one, I'm going to warn you - I'm a sentimental old fool and don't intend to keep any of that back:

When Brent was called as bishop of the Twelfth Ward, one of his greatest concerns, he told me, was that he might have to conduct one of his parent's funerals.  They were, after all, getting older in years and it was, without question, not beyond the realm of possibilities that either one or even possibly both could be gone during his tenure as bishop.

We were both grateful that their strength and health would prove his fears unfounded.  We've been blessed by their continued influence in our lives for nearly ten years beyond that time.  And what a joy it's been.   But lingering in our minds has always been the knowledge that "some day" we would have to say goodbye.   For now.

And this was that day.

I will cover it in four parts:  Flag, Funeral, Cemetery, Luncheon.   There was more, but  I've covered the roses previously and the Easter Egg Hunt will be included in my next post (which will be about Easter).

Flag:
The day dawned sunny and warm, a beautiful spring morning.  Early,  Sean, Brent and I went over to Edna's.  Sean wanted to do one more service for his Grandfather.  Growing up he had loved when Grandpa let him raise the flag on their flagpole out front.  Now Sean wanted to raise it one more time.

It clicked to the top of the pole.   Then after a brief pause, Sean lowered it to half mast to honor his grandfather.

Kathy helped Edna to the front porch to watch.   I have to admit, I was so proud of Sean as he did this.  It was a very solemn, sweet experience.   Mark also raised his own flag and put it at half mast for the day.   Later, Tonya told me, she was doing just fine as they drove down 300 West to go to the Church for the funeral.  And then they passed Mark's and Edna's homes and she saw the flags, and she said, "That was it!  I just lost it totally!" 

I think it's good that there are things that make us lose it totally, especially when they are reminders of a loved one who is no longer alive.

Funeral:
Three of Grandpa's grandsons are uniformed public servants.  Kevin is with the Air Force, Sean with the Army, and Bill with the Lehi Police Department.  At the request of the brothers and Ann, they came in uniform on this day.  Grandpa had to be bursting buttons proud of them!  I know I was.

 Later they would serve as honor guard for the pallbearers. 

There was a viewing prior to the services.  In our building they use the Primary Room because it has more than one door.  Bill and Stephanie brought their girls in to see their "Swingset Grandpa."  Their relationship with him has been an especially sweet thing in their lives and it was heartbreaking to have him gone. 

I posted this next photo on Facebook a while ago.  It was just such a sweet gift to discover the poster in the background as I was going through and preparing the photos for posting:

"Families Are Forever" - Maddy, Ashlyn and Stephanie

Mark's daughter Amy had spent hours gathering photos from everyone and putting them into a beautiful slide show with music.  It was wonderfully done.   Howard's son gave the Family Prayer before the family moved into the chapel for the services.

The services were so, well, just perfect.  What else can I say.  Tonya accompanied three numbers, including the one all the grandchildren and great-grandchildren sang as well as Shikay, Jonathan, and Seth's number and then Heather and Branch singing "Aloha Oe" at the conclusion of the services.  Heather's voice came across mellow and sweet, perfect for the song Leo loved so much.  I was just proud of all of them.   Mark's biographical sketch was so well done.  I can't wait to get a copy of it.  And then when all the grandchildren stayed on the stand after singing "I Am a Child of God" I'm sure people were checking their watches.  But those kids all stayed brief in their comments and each was so appropriate.  They were asked to share their favorite memories of their grandfather, and all were sweet and to the point.  They spoke powerfully about the positive influence one person can have on the lives of so many.

The services on this day were a fitting tribute to a man who lived a good life, who was a wonderful and loyal husband and hard working, caring father.  He lived a life of quiet service in everything he did.  And through it all, he endowed his family with his delightful sense of humor and resiliency.  He loved his family, his devotion to Edna was without question and his smile every time the great-grandkids showed up was evident of the love he had for them.  His example is worth emulating.  We are missing him so much, but are grateful for the great memories we have of this man we called "Husband," "Dad," "Grandpa," "Swingset Grandpa" (to differentiate between Brent and him), and all the other terms of endearment as varied as the people themselves, that he was to each of us.

Funeral Program:

Cemetery:
Leo's body was interred in the Lehi Cemetery.  It isn't all that far from our Church building.  I wanted to get some photos as people were arriving so we slipped out the "in" on the parking lot and took the "quick" way to the cemetery.  You learn a lot of tricks while Bishop and Relief Society president on how to get there before the funeral procession arrives.  But I never dreamed we would be trying to do that when we really should have been part of the procession itself.  Stephanie's father Arlo also came to take photos.  Between the two of us, we managed to cover things very well.  I really appreciated his willingness to do that.  I will acknowledge the ones that come from him in the individual caption.  The rest are mine.

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

(Ok, really need to insert a disclaimer here:  people were not being grumpy.  They were not scowling, and though this was a solemn occasion, we were not openly weeping.  There was a light cloud coverage and, quite frankly, it was BRIGHT out there.   We were all squinting.  Just wanted to make that perfectly clear lest someone who doesn't know us as a family might think otherwise.)

Ann arrived with buckets full of flowers so everyone would have an opportunity to place one on the casket at the conclusion of the graveside grave dedication. 

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

 That was a special experience for all the children (regardless of age).

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

To honor Dad's service in the military and to recognize that, Bill and Sean escorted the pallbearers in bringing the casket to grave side.  Kevin, an officer and highest ranking, was placed in the honor spot at the rear.  

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

 

Brent gave a dedicatory prayer on the grave.  I love this practice of dedicating the grave site, of blessing it to guard the remains and hold them safe. 

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

Following the Dedication, were the military honors.  Leo was not a life time military vet, having served just three years during WWII, so there was not a 21 gun salute (much to Heather's relief), but taps were played and the flag presented to Edna after being folded by the military and then turned over to Kevin for the presentation in behalf of the President of the United States in recognition of the service Leo rendered to his country.

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

 Following the services at the cemetery, we mingled a little.  The pall bearers placed their boutonnieres on the casket.  Everyone else added their flowers to the collection on both sides of the casket piece.

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

  Brent had Bill hold onto the flag to keep it safe while he escorted Edna to the car.

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Mickelsen

Photo by Arlo Mickelsen

 And the rest of us mingled a little while longer.  I, um,lost the camera about this time and didn't get it back for a while.  Makinzee took a lot of the following photos (and some of the earlier ones - because these are not necessarily inserted in the same order they were taken), but then it got passed on to someone else.  Who????    I was pleasantly surprised to find a lot of photos added to the camera while it was roaming around the cemetery on its own!

Photo by Arlo Mickelsen

Photo by Arlo Mickelsen

 Luncheon:
 Funeral potatoes - did they originate in Utah?   Well, there's a reason for them.  And we enjoyed those along with all the rest of the great food our ward (congregation) provided for us when we returned from the cemetery.  It was good to be able to visit and mingle and give hugs and visit and mingle a little more.  Oh, and eat.  Most of us were quite hungry by this point.

(I must have been after an eating shot with this one.  I think it was a success.  Sorry, all!)

Yes, I do believe I'll have a little bread with my butter."

Karla Nielsen and Birgitta Holbrook

 The food was wonderful and these terrific women worked their hearts out and toes off to make sure we had enough to eat.

Colleen Petersen and Connie Baker

 After the luncheon, an egg hunt, and digging in the roses, a few of us made our way back up to the cemetery.  We had some flower hungry girls tag along.

 Leo and Edna purchased their plots years (and years) ago.  Recently they bought a headstone for it.  Not a bad idea at all for those of us who want to hedge our bets on funeral costs going up.  These sweet ladies are four of my 13 grandchildren.  I love them all so much!

It was a full, sad, emotional, happy, wonderful day!  I think of those major milestones in a person's life and am impressed by the story about the dash.  None of us were alive on Leo's first important day - his birth.  And look what he has left - a legacy of family, friends, and love.  I would say he's definitely filled his dash to the brim!

Oh, PS- 

 On Arlo's camera, Dan's smile appeared!

 

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Michelsen

 And one last note, lest we get a little too serious here....

Photo Courtesy of Arlo Michelsen

 (Not intentionally goofy, but we aced it anyway)

 Love you All!